Aufsitzrasenmähermän Jan Hauenstein

- Instrumental chorus (like next three lines) -
He is the (C)Aufsitzrasenmähermän,
He (F)mähs that Rasen as fast as only he can,
The (C)Aufsitzrasen(F)mä(G7)her(C)män! (F) (G)

Sieht er (C)ungemähten Rasen,
Dann siehst du ihn schon rasen,
Im (F)Sprung sitzt er auf seinen Aufsitzrasenmäher auf,
Schon (C)nimmt des Rasens Schicksal seinen (F)rasend(G)schnellen (C)Lauf!

Er (Am)rast auf dem Rasen he(Em)rum, brumm, brumm, brumm,
Mäht (F)Millonen Gazillionen (G) Grashalme um;
Die (Am)Kühe muhen, die (Em)Schafe mähen,
Wenn (F)sie ihr Mittagessen (G) sterben sehen!(hold)

Here comes the (C)Aufsitzrasenmähermän,
He (F)mähs that Rasen as fast as only he can,
The (C)Aufsitzrasen(F)mä(G7)her(C)män! (F) (G)

Der (C)Aufsitzrasenmähermän, ich (C7)gebe dir mein Wort,
Er (F)hält den Aufsitzrasenmäher(G)weltrekord!
Er (C)rastet nicht, er mäht und rast und (C7)rast und mäht,
Bis (F)wirklich kein Grashalm mehr (C)in den (C7)Grashalm(F)auffang(G)beutel (C)geht!

Die (Am)Kühe und die Schafe, die Kar(Em)nickel und die Hasen
Seh´n den (F)Aufsitzrasenmähermän auf (G)ihrem Rasen rasen,
Hinter (Am)ihm ist die Rasenfläche (Em)wüst und leer und tot -
Rasen (F)grasen ist nun mal (G)dieser Tiere Brot.(hold)

Here comes the (C)Aufsitzrasenmähermän,
He (F)mähs that Rasen as fast as only he can,
The (C)Aufsitzrasen(F)mä(G7)her(C)män! (F) (G)

Der (Dm)Rasenfresstiere (G)Pein ist ihm egal,
Ich (Dm)mäh´ den Rasen, sagt er, so (G)ist das nun mal!(hold)

Ich bin der (C)Aufsitzrasenmähermän,
Ich (F)mäh that Rasen as fast as only I can,
I am the (C)Aufsitzrasen(F)mä(G7)her(C)män! I (F)mäh! (G)

(C) Mäh mäh, ma-mäh mäh mäh,
Ma-ma-ma-(F)ma mäh mäh, ma- mäh mäh mäh,
(C) Mäh mäh, ma-ma-ma-mäh mäh mäh,
Ma-ma-ma-(F)ma mäh mäh, (G)ma- ma-ma-ma-ma-ma (C)mäh! (F)Mäh that (G)Rasen!

Er (C)mäht den Rasen bei (C7)Regen, Blitz und Sturm,
Schont (F)keinen kleinen Grashalm, keinen (G)feinen Regenwurm,
Da (C)trifft den Aufsitzrasen(G/B)mäher(Am)män ein Ge(F)witterblitz am (G)Steuer…
Er(Dm)leichtert sagen Mümmler und (G) Wiederkäuer:(hold)

He was the (C)Aufsitzrasenmähermän,
He (F)used to mäh faster than Superman can,
He was the (C)Aufsitzrasen(F)mä(G7)her(C)män, (F) (G)
The (F)famous naked (G)Aufsitzrasen(F)mä(G7)her(C)män, (F) (G)
The (Am)one and only (Em)Rasen-killing, (Am)world record-(Em)holding,
(Dm)Dumb and ugly, (E7)fast and furious, (Am)arrogant and (D7)stupid
(F)Aufsitzrasen(G)mä(G7)her(C)män! (G7)(hold) (C)(hold) (C)

Jan Hauenstein, Goettingen, words 27 November 2017 during the halftime-break of a football
(soccer) match, small repairs and music 28 November

janhauenstein@gmx.de www.janhauenstein.com

A literal translation:

Lawn Tractor Man Jan Hauenstein

He is the lawn tractor man,
He mows that lawn as fast as only he can,
The lawn tractor man!

When he sees an unmowed lawn
You´ll see him race,
With a jump he´s on his riding lawn mower,
And the fate of the lawn is sealed racingly fast!

He races around the lawn, roar, roar, roar,
Mows down millions of gazillions blades of grass.
Cows are mooing, sheep are bleating
When they witness the death of their dinner!

Here comes the lawn tractor man,
He mows that lawn as fast as only he can,
The lawn tractor man!

The lawn tractor man, I give you my word,
Holds the lawn tractor mowing world record!
He never rests, he mows and races and races and mows,
Until really not another single blade of grass will fit into the grass-catching bag!

The cow and the sheep, the rabbits and the hares,
See the lawn tractor man race across their lawn,
Behind him the lawn is wasted, empty and dead -
Grazing is, after all, those animals’ bread.

Here comes the lawn tractor man,
He mows that lawn as fast as only he can,
The lawn tractor man!

The pain of the grass-nibbling animals does not bother him,
I mow the lawn, he says, and that’s the way it is!

I am the lawn tractor man,
I mow that lawn as fast as only I can,
I am the lawn tractor man! I mow!

Bleat bleat, blu-bleat bleat bleat,
Blu-blu-blu-blu-bleat bleat, blu-bleat bleat bleat,
Bleat bleat. blu-blu-blu-bleat bleat bleat,
Blu-blu-blu-blu-bleat bleat, blu-blu-blu-blu-bleat! Mow that lawn!

He mows the lawn, be there rain, lightning or storm,
Saves not a small blade of grass, no fine earthworm,
There! A thunderbolt strikes lawn tractor man dead at the wheel,
Relieved, the nibblers and the ruminants squeal:

He was the lawn tractor man,
He used to mow faster than Superman can,
He was the lawn tractor man,
The famous naked lawn tractor man,
The one and only lawn-killing, world record-holding,
Dumb and ugly, fast and furious, arrogant and stupid lawn tractor man!